He has fallen from grace. All the wonderful things I thought about him have now been harshly removed from my mind to be replaced by a bitterness and a sadness that rivals none.
How could he have been so insensitive? What possesses someone to show a complete lack of consideration for other people’s feelings? Was his sole motivation a need to see me cry? Was this some long ago planned vengeance that he just now has the opportunity to unleash?
I am hurt beyond words…..
And I am convinced that there is some wicked higher power that prevents me from moving on. How much longer must I live with this barren unhappiness, loving so much and yet unable to love who is most important? This sickness, because it is a sickness, has plagued me for far too long. I need to move on.
So I pray for strength. Like so many times before, I kneel before the All Mighty begging to be spared from my dilemma.
I hope he hears me.
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